My Mental Health Journal

So today was matchday at Molineux, a time when I’m always feeling a little anxious about getting through a crowd full of people to see a game. I’ve always struggled to get ready just to get out the door but I push through it as best I can. With the support of my family and the amazing, kind and caring people who support me through social media, they push me on and give me the strength to beat it. Today though was different, so different but in a good positive way.

I decided to get ready early for the game and take away one less thing I feel anxious about. Maybe it helped in a way because today was the day I felt as calm as I could possibly be, a day when my anxiety didn’t even show his face. A day when it decided not to give me a fight because deep down it knew it was going to lose. I hadn’t felt that good in a long long time. I actually felt normal, if that makes any sense? Like a part of the old me had made a return. Today was the day I felt comfortable singing the songs in the stadium without fear of feeling like an idiot, previous games this season I’ve just sat there unable to speak. I talked to other fans around me, something I’ve not done all season, it wasn’t ignoring them in previous games, it’s how my anxiety had an impact on my confidence around other people. I laughed and joked with them too. I felt completely at ease today and with my brother by my side I felt like I could tackle anything life threw at me.

Today is the first step on that ladder to feeling like myself again. I don’t intend on falling off this time. I’m making that climb and I’m going to beat it!